Poet with beard too insecure to shave; poet: "People will see the real me and if they see the real me they'll hate me like I hate myself."
Poet takes break from following friend on Facebook who keeps posting pictures of an ugly baby.
Poet kills ant on kitchen counter and then contemplates what it all means.
Regardless of situation, when poet gets mad, they just mumble, "fucking millennials."
Poet learns partner really doesn't like sentences that begin with "You should..."
Black poet fucking tired of being intellectual Rubik's Cube for white poets.
Poet at Chipotle uses burrito bowl as dip for chips; wonders if Louise Glück ever eats at Chipotle.
Poet realizes while dying the story they were telling themselves about themselves was the most self-limiting one.
Sober poet always sees that exact moment when a friend crosses the threshold into a buzz.
Poet just wants to drive a 2002 Chrysler Sebring convertible into a Trader Joe's and start weeping.